Winter Storms Now Have Names

Yesterday, I heard on the news that The Weather Channel is going to start naming winter storms. 

YES.

I cannot tell you how excited I am for this. Part of it is that I’m super excited for chillier weather and snow, yes, snow. So ready for snow. 

But let’s be honest: how much cooler and easier would it be to refer to past blizzards by name?! Remember the blizzard our sophomore year, where the roads didn’t get plowed and Metro Transit stopped running at 6 am?

BLIZZARD BJORN. I WISH.

Some people say it’s not worth the time because there’s no standard for naming a storm (like the way hurricanes have Categories). This doesn’t concern me! How about naming the ones that are like, REALLY BIG STORM CELLS. Problem solved. If there aren’t standards for categorizing blizzards, maybe this will push research to develop them. Eh? Eh? Yes.

I agree that it’ll make it easier to dispense information about really bad storms. Also, I think people will prepare for a storm better if they think that Blizzard Artemis is coming to collect their souls than if “A snow storm will be expected to reach Minneapolis by Friday, and is expected to dump 5 inches of snow”. Boring. Bring it on Artemis! I can shoot a bow and arrow too!

Some Things Never Change: A Reflection on The First Day of School

Today, during my run, my knees hurt too much, but that’s not important. Fall has started. I know it’s fall because when I run I smell the concoction of sweat, harvest sunset, the arid musk of decaying leaves, and synthetic fibers. It calls to mind the hundreds upon hundreds of soccer practices by the lake. That smell is my culture.

Last night, I didn’t sleep. I’m not sure why this is. School doesn’t cause me a lot of excitement or anxiety, but I tend to not sleep well the first night before a new semester starts. I was fine though–I think this was the first time in college when I didn’t sleep in class during the first day (although it was probably warranted. I can’t decide whether it’s good or bad that as a senior, I’m still being introduced to how science works?).

People are irresponsible with their bikes. These bikers who refuse to wear a helmet and poke vicariously out through intersections. It gives me anxiety because I know they’re giving drivers anxiety, and the way any driver reacts to an irresponsible biker is unpredictable. I like biking because of the consistency, the loss of self as you become one with the bike around corners and through underpasses. When bikers are stupid, I can’t lose myself like that. Please start playing safe. More complaining: too many bikes on the sidewalk. Stop being assholes, guys, and walk your wheels.

The campus connector. I’m pleased to report I can still dance the Campus Connector Dance–the careful multistepped ballet, whereas you are given only a half square foot of space to stand while the bus wheels around corners.

More on the Campus Connector: girls with too much makeup. Preps talking too loud about welcome week and their roommates. People with huge backpacks and no knowledge of WHERE THEIR BACKPACK IS PLEASE STEP BACK YOU’RE IN MY SPACE AND IT’S NOT VERY LARGE. People who read stupid books. Frat boys who listen to Wicked (all of them). People on their cell phones. (I’m not judgmental.)

More professors complaining about how they don’t know why the scientist who “invented” pH decided that low pH corresponds to high [H+]. We all learned what pH is in high school, you don’t have to be apologetic about it. The science works, stop being sorry.

There are 10x more runners on the river roads. 90% of them are tall shirtless attractive men with very long strides. This is not helpful.

Students in the front row who gives awkward answers to every awkward question the professor asks. “What else did this video say about diffusion?” “Size matters!”. Okay, if you need a video to give primary instruction, stop teaching. If you think you need to teach diffusion to a class of upperclassmen, stop teaching. And stop making penis jokes.

Oh, I forgot. No homework at night. Happy first week of school!

Why You Should Be Skeptical of the U’s 5-Star LGBT Rating

Campus Pride is known for giving schools scores yearly for how LGBT-friendly university campuses are. Cool. It’s great that we have an organization that does that, because it might spur some schools to make changes to help make their campus more LGBT-friendly. Awesome.

But when the U gets essentially a 5/5 rating, you should be skeptical. On the ranking they recently released, they got 2nd. Fine. The U does do great. Maybe we are one of the best. One of the reasons I picked the U was because it, and Minneapolis, are really gay-friendly.

But to suggest we are 5/5 implies we don’t have room to improve. That there isn’t still institutional homophobia.

The ratings must not survey a lot of students, because many trans* students have told me about awful experiences at Boynton.

They must not be considering LGBT safety in the greater Twin Cities area. Students usually do leave campus fairly often, especially since most live off-campus. Frankly, as a gay student, there are places I don’t feel safe being.

They must not have asked the LGBT students that had awful experiences with law enforcement.

Even on Coffman’s 2nd Floor do I not feel the safest. I’ve overheard people talking about the QSCC space, essentially saying it doesn’t belong there as a legitimate cultural group. I’ve overheard people talking about those “weirdos”.

They must not know that the QSCC recently almost lost it’s space completely on the 2nd floor.

I get that there is only so much the U can do on the policy side of things (and they’ve done nearly all of that–awesome!), but if you have “climate index”, then you have to look at more than just campus policy.

So, let’s applaud the U for being a leader, but lets be skeptical of perfect ratings. Let’s work on making this campus, and this city, be safe for everyone everywhere. I shouldn’t be scared to hold my partner’s hand in Dinkytown or on Nicollet Mall.

When Gay Goes Viral

When I first saw this photo, my first thought was dear sweet lord what in seven hells is that?!

Then, all of a sudden, Facebook flippin’ erupted. This picture was shared, it was made into profile pictures, people were protesting, people were mocking the protesters. What the hell guys? Sometimes it doesn’t even feel like these fights are about real things, but more of a chance for people to broadcast their position. Yeah, well, I’m loving and caring and I want two men to be able to love each other so duh! or I care about the natural order of things. Boo oreo!  

I mean, the fact that this all erupted over an oreo couldn’t have been more symbolic. The oreo: a mass manufactured American desert chock full of artificial ingredients, layered with a middle part of aerosoled white goop. I don’t like oreo’s, and I never really have. People love oreos, and omg they love sharing this photo. The oreo has no substance, and honestly all this riff and noise about the oreo also has no substance. Seeing this photo everywhere was like being showering in some weird commercialized version of homonormativity. That’s mostly not a joke.

Part of my angst is because I don’t care if a corporation comes out in support of teh gayz. The other part is the cringing I do when I see even people on my side of the debate post this picture and say “I support LOVE. If you choose to love someone of the same sex, I DON’T CARE! LOVE!”

Choose???? And really, all caps? I’m dying here.

Then, as if the holy Silver Fox heard my prayers from the enormous pedestal he sits on, Anderson Cooper comes out, but by God he manages to bring dimension, depth, and nuance to it. This also went viral, because I don’t know, gay things just go viral. I don’t get it. And his message is totally on point: yeah, I’m gay and happy, but like I really care about reporting so just let me be a reporter and stop asking me the gay question, thx guyz. 

Also, he’s totally on point on why he’s doing this. Love it:

I’ve also been reminded recently that while as a society we are moving toward greater inclusion and equality for all people, the tide of history only advances when people make themselves fully visible. There continue to be far too many incidences of bullying of young people, as well as discrimination and violence against people of all ages, based on their sexual orientation, and I believe there is value in making clear where I stand.

It’s actually really cool that I know a lot of people who are super supportive of gay rights. It’s alright that a bunch of big companies and corporations have listed their “support” for gay rights, even though I’m positive their idea of gay rights probably isn’t parallel with my own. But honestly, if this conversation could spend more time in Anderson Cooper-like vignettes and less time being reduced to a cookie, that would be totally cool. Even more honestly, go volunteer with kids. Clear all your appointments in early November so you can vote out this marriage amendment. Stop using the words “gay” and “fag” and don’t let people around you do it. Love the people around you. Real progress isn’t going to be made by discussing a cookie.

And please, never offer me an oreo. Ruins your teeth folks.

Does it Matter if Meat is Kosher?

Jewish law laid down in what most people know as the Old Testament tells people what counts as kosher meat. Kosher meat is meat that qualifies itself through a certain butchering and processing system as overseen by a rabbi. I don’t fully get it–following the rules of keeping things kosher seems silly to me, but I say that without any sort of smirk or snark. Everyone does silly things with their meat, and I care very little.

But I do know a few people who are not Jewish and will still prefer kosher meat because they consider the process more humane to the animals and a more ethical economic and environmental process. I also know a few people who consider the process distinctly inhumane. One famous kosher meat producer, Hebrew National, is in trouble for perhaps labeling non-kosher meat as kosher. Whatever.

Since I was trolling CNN and had food on the mind, I figured I would share this article on sweet corn, complete with this quote from Garrison Keillor: “Sex is good, but not as good as fresh sweet corn.” Spoken like a true Midwesterner.

Although, the writer of that article also wrote: “When I think of eating corn, I immediately envision butter on my cheeks and wet corn leaves on the back of my hands.” Uhhhhh. dot. dot. dot. awkward.

I receive email

Technically, my email is public. I have no qualms publishing the dirt I get. I reserve every right to name who sends me emails, but mostly I don’t think it’s important. Check out this gem:

Fox News is already cowering down to the President…

In response to President Obama’s complaint that FOX News doesn’t show enough Black and Hispanic people on their network, FOX has announced that they will now air “America’s Most Wanted” TWICE a week.

I don’t care who you are, that’s funny!

This made me want to vomit. Literally.

Do we own our own genome?

tl;dr: Zach is further comtemplating whether the way we use language reflects reality.

This week in evolution we are having a discussion on genome scans. There is a small handful of private companies that offer to sequence certain parts of your genome that might give you potentially useful information. These companies claim they can evaluate your risk of developing baldness, diabetes, or blue eyes (hopefully something that has developed by now! they test it anyway!).

One of the prompting questions is this:

Who owns information about your genome? You or the company that gives you the results?

Cue pop culture reference to Michael Crichton novels. 

Really, it’s hard to get into good relevant discussions about most things with lay persons, so hopefully an in-department facilitated discussion will be good. But like, is DNA information something we can even own?

When I consider possession, I think of something you can store and restrict access to. In this way we own land, laptops, stores of food, or in the past, people. But if a company sequences your DNA, they have the information readily available. There’s nothing to stop you sequencing it yourself. Or having someone else sequence your DNA. I’m not sure a DNA sequence (in the form of the data file: ie: ATGCGCGTATTTGA) is really an “ownable” thing.

It’s a law that you can’t patent laws of nature. Yet there is a way to make money off the weather through stock markets. It’s a law that you can’t make money off of people without giving them some of the profit (aka: slavery). Yet people have been making money off DNA sequences and other human byproducts (like HeLa cells) without most people batting an eye. [Curiously, you could argue using HeLa cells isn't at all like slavery and more like owning a cow to produce milk. Some scientists consider HeLa cells a separate species!]

Perhaps, to avoid these ambiguities and confusions, we should just abandon use of any type of language that implies ownership, and instead talk about the ethical uses of information. Surely there are precedents for this. If you steal a small vial of blood from an individual who is HIV resistant, you owe them compensation (and probably jail time). If I donate my blood, and it happens to be HIV resistant, you should be allowed to make as much money off of it as you can. That’s how donation works. You might argue–”I didn’t know my blood could be so valuable. I want compensation!”. But no one would buy that if you accidentally donated an extremely valuable antique to a consignment store.

Conclusion: Can we properly use the verb own in front of any noun? Can I own concepts? Laws of nature? Sets of information? Can I own a word (sounds absurd, but people do own songs).

Pick One: Lattes or Homos

Sometimes I can’t believe the stuff that shows up in the news. Starbucks has come out in support of gay marriage. This isn’t anything new, as last year they wrote an amicus brief to the Supreme Court asking them to overturn the DOMA. You can almost predict the reactions:

• Yay starbucks! Will be drinking you tomorrow!
• Starbucks shouldn’t be diving into political matters!
• What? They support homos? Not drinking there anymore.
• Starbucks is an international company–what will the Middle East say?!?!

For the record, if you have a problem with the gay community, I’m not really sure Starbucks is your scene in the first place.

HRC came out in support of Starbucks (no surprise). And NOM started a “Dump Starbucks” movement (lol).

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again–I think the debate and controversy over gay marriage is way blown out of proportion. There are bigger things to worry about, but it is a fight that needs to be fought. So be it.

But frankly, why isn’t anyone reminding us that hey–Starbucks isn’t the ethical supergiant we’re starting to portray it as. They’re known for mistreating workers, driving out local vendors, wasting enormous amounts of water, and ruining the financial security of coffee bean farmers, among other things. Like, it’s cool if you want to start supporting Starbucks because hey–they think it’s cool if two dudes want to marry. But I don’t give two shits–Starbucks could tell me I look pretty every morning and I’m still not going to prefer their coffee because they’re the most unethical brand on the market. Yeah, I buy their coffee when it’s the cheapest at Lunds–we’re not all perfect!

Starbucks is a corporation. And honestly, while they know they might lose a few customers, they know they will likely gain  a few, and perhaps turn a few customers into regulars. Making statements about social issues isn’t remarkably political, and it’s more about branding.

Starbucks is a corporation. They do bad things. If you’re going to make decisions about where to buy your coffee off of things like this, you ought to  consider everything Starbucks does and says.

In the end, this will end up as a win for the gay community. The conservative view of marriage is dropping in popularity because people are seeing it as petty. When a major anti-same sex marriage organization starts boycotting the morning coffee over the thought of two men being granted basic civil privileges, it becomes easier and easier to redefine petty. Go and read this conservatively-biased take on the issue. Tell me you didn’t roll your eyes. For fairness, here’s the liberal HuffPo take.

I’m a cynic and this all sorts of grinds my gears, but I can’t help but smirk knowing this will inevitably help our cause.

 

I Sing The Body Political

[Youtube link refuses to embed! Argh. Foiled.]

I was quoted in the Daily. Oops.

So there’s a lot of noise about this marriage amendment. As there has been. And as there will be, even after the vote is tallied. And my exhaustion will carry on with it.

Honestly, I have an enormous amount of respect for every activist who has been fighting, battle after battle, lawsuit after lawsuit, vote after vote. At the same time, I have to blame them as well for my exhaustion with this issue.

And it is because my body is political. It is not even a choice!

I am gay, and therefore the conservative right deems me damnable.

I am gay, and therefore the liberal left expects me to be an activist. An activist for marriage equality! The rallying banner of the gay world!

I have about as much interest in getting legally married as I do in the stock market. I hope to do it one day, and my life will probably be better off for it, but I know I’ll likely be just fine as I am. I am exhausted of making the marriage argument, and I am exhausted of being expected to parrot it!

I’m sorry for not being sorry. Kids are being harassed in the schools and some of them are dying. And we are forced to spend millions of hours and dollars fighting an amendment that will change very little! If the amendment doesn’t pass, my life goes on as normal. If it does, it makes the future a little bleaker. Kids are still dying.

And no, I won’t buy the nonsense that marriage is a stepping stone, and that bullying will come later. Who the hell decided marriage is a more important stepping stone? Frankly, if we were to better address attitudes towards queer communities, we’d probably lower the numbers of kids being harassed and we’d likely get more votes for marriage equality.

But I mean, I get it. Marriage equality is something you can fight for, something you can write down in the law and see the courts and government dole out your privileges. Tackling the issues of homophobia and transphobia are hard and abstract. And frankly, I’m enormously skeptical that marriage equality will help much. Sure, we may win some over in the fight, but we’re probably digging the trenches between us and them even deeper.

Spending my childhood growing up being incubated with the gross reasonings of why gay people deserve to be a second class of citizens, and then being classed in scientific and critical thinking, has brought me to be even more passionate about wanting to be a teacher and wanting to teach critical thinking to our youth. The freedom that we find when we are rightfully given the tools to search for knowledge is as sweet a drink as we may ever find. For some reason, our schools and our parents have been failing to teach our children that harassment and marginalization of people hardly different from themselves actually drags society down. That these are actually immoral things to do. Perhaps it is because we are too busy telling children to play nice, instead of showing them why.

Voltaire once said “Every man is guilty of all the good he didn’t do.” We need to start reminding people that neglect is just as painful as any other form of abuse. It does no good if you point the finger and say “that’s wrong” while some kid gets his face punched in.

So, when it comes to you, what will you do? Will you do you part and point your finger, vote “no” on the amendment, and move along your way? Or will you go beyond just voting no?

Spread the word. Smile at all. Make a new friend each day.  Step up.

Why I support negative ads

On Friday the Guardian posted a short video of South Carolinan residents being interviewed on the GOP field of candidates, one day before the primary. It’s called Primary Voices and it’s worth a watch.

Among the things said by these interesting individuals is that they wish negative ads weren’t being run.

Oh really?

You know, I wish there was no such thing as HIV. I wish I didn’t have to take redundant classes at university. I wish I could marry the person I love. I wish I could eat barbecue every day of my life.

But I’m okay with negative attack ads. I would go as far to say I tacitly support them. I may not have a TV, but I have the internet, and if you’ve ever been introduced to the internet, you know it’s one big attack ad all the time.

How else would we have found out Ron Paul is a racist, that Newt Gingrich is a flip-flopping adulterer, or that Romney stabbed people in the back while working at Bain? Maybe not every detail is relevant to the POTUS campaign, but I still want to know more about a candidate than just his version of his story (sticking with his since all of the GOP candidates are dudes).  The last person I trust to give an honest account of himself is a presidential candidate.

Of course, I don’t expect much higher-level thinking from a party that thinks God should be placed first in government, or one that boos the Golden Rule or gay soldiers at debates.

Santorum is an idiot. Yes–no social group should have special priveledge in the military, but it’s okay for straight people to be known as straight and gays should be shoved in the closet? That’s the difference.

I don’t know what is happening to the GOP. And SC voting for Gingrich? Carville says it best:

This series of failures by the race’s heavyweights has cleared the way for Newt Gingrich, a state of affairs that delights Carville. “I cannot personally tell you how pleased I am,” he says, “to see old Newt rise to the top after listening to all of your nauseating, sickening lectures on the evils of government and the importance of family values.”

Thrice-married Newt, he reminds Republicans, has yet to adequately explain what Freddie Mac paid him $1.6 million to do. He wishes them luck, but urges them to enjoy the Superbowl, “It could be your last hurrah for a while.”

They all have the goal of getting Obama out of office but I’m not sure they know that. Let the entertainment continue.